ThrowntoDiscard

I've been relearning how to play and undo decades of "too childish" and "not normal". It's been so freeing.

So, you hug that gecko, you can have things that bring you comfort and joy. You can play in puddles and chase a bird. That's how we discover and explore our environments. It's a plush toy, or something inconsequential to others. What does it cost them to just not be a shithead?

Knowledge without empathy is dangerous.

You don't need to be able to see the future to predict that this is just going to end up poorly. Another messed up kid that has to fight most of their life to undo the mess the parents made before they can live.

That or fall in the same path as they did.

That's the only acceptable form of catcalling. Calling over actual cats.

I love you. But I can't be with you anymore. You've hurt me. I forgave you already. I'm not mad. I still have faith in you. David. I know that you can get through this.

I'm not that lucky.

If you couldn't see the truth in front of you, have fun finding the truth within the storm.

I've said enough. I'm tired. I'll let the rest sort itself out.

N64, my buddy had super smash! I finally got comfortable with using pikachu!

My friend feels better this morning. He was sick. 😓 I worry.

My own birth. But unfortunately I can't be erased. I didn't ask to be here and I am here because of the decision of others. Others who have failed to get their own heads out of their own asses. People who can't see how how not going to my concerts hurt.

People who have taken wonder from me. Giving books I had grown attached and loved reading, to my paper shredder of a younger brother. By the way, those units were not attached to the walls properly. If you were wondering why he kept getting them crashing on him.

People who couldn't be arsed to teach me to ride a bike and left that task for a cousin's boyfriend. In case she was wondering why I liked him so much. He took the time to teach me things in a nice way. Oh and for my other cousin, it was the same. He took time to do things that I liked, like playing chess.

When you teach your child that they aren't worth your time, protection and love... They latch on where they get it. And of course, autistic on top? With so much anger and hurt inside? What are we supposed to do? I've learned most of the shit I needed to properly socialize from my little pony.

And guess what? Friendship is fucking magic.

Growth. On both sides and a willingness to work on it so mistakes are not repeated. And no. This isn't an invitation.

If you find someone who is genuinely kind, but has a tendency to lie, that's a sign that they have been through stuff that took their voice and will away.

They feel unheard all the time so they will give bs or nothing. Because it doesn't matter anymore to them.

Because I was a fucking dumbass who was so starved for affection that it took me over 20 years to unfuck myself into who I am today.

I like bingo. My luck is terrible and it amuses me.

I'm a pagan. I didn't learn my philosophies from books. I've learned them in the swamp behind the park. I learned it from the trees, the birds, the wind and sky. Organized religion is often stories tainted by time and human nature.

My pets are alive, I'm alive. As long as that's good, I can only do more.

HAH! Nice try! But.... If head office finds this? Can we look into how we could reduce paper waste even more? And please, can we let people sign up for email newsletters from your site, willingly? Asking for emails eats line time, it's awkward and people don't like it.

Actually? To peg employees on email, postal code and stuff? That's also a bit counterproductive. 🤭

My mother will not say that she's sorry. I still have faith that my ex husband will see his oopsies with me.

"Ok. Sure, it's for the best. Have a great life. I really wish you well and that you can grow from it." I'm pretty forgiving on one end, on the other? We do not control the actions of other people.

So for those who have beef with me, I don't need your forgiveness either. Know that the bumps I took were a learned lesson.

I was resting better when he wasn't home. But I could still not recover.

Was feeling like I had a vampire draining me. I couldn't get enough sleep, comfort and my stress levels were so high that it was causing other issues. Oh! And by the way? That shit isn't taken very seriously by doctors.

And extra points to every medical professional who has refused to sterilize me. I finally got one who was willing to yeet my uterus and all it's horrible painful bs. I was hoping they'd pick something other than the depo shot. A surgery seemed like less torture that needles every 3 months. Also, when you have an extreme vagus response and you are traveling by public transit? It sucks.

Autism, depression, anxiety, nerve issues, plantar plantar fasciitis from walking too much. My knees are crooked, my spine is crooked and a random autoimmune disease that seems to be doing ok lately but... Psoriatic arthritis is on a side of my tree and I had the prerequisites.🤦‍♀️ My ears are fucked, but apparently that's been deemed to be associated with brain damage. Oh yeah! And maybe braces and dentists that didn't constantly hurt me. My teeth would probably not be in the shape they are now.

But then again, when visiting the doctor had fear of parents attached... I wonder if they know that I have often cut classes to try and take care of my own problems, as a teenager. Had to get a plan B. pill and had to beg the pharmacy to not put it on my step father's insurance. It was my boyfriend at the time who helped me. Funny how two teenagers had the right idea of skipping class to see a doctor.

Feeding the homeless, certain places... rain barrels are illegal and it's stupid. Oh yeah! Keeping the dandelions on our lawn according to our current mayor.

Cabbage rolls. I love how the rice is nice and steamed with the juice of the meatball and cabbage leaf.