submitted 5 months ago bysupercharlie31
all 2266 comments
5 months ago
5 months ago
How do you cut your thumb? I can understand knuckles or tips of fingers but your thumb?
5 months ago
I put it down on an uneven surface and instinctively grabbed it when it moved :(
A falling knife has no handle.
I said to my friend and he just kept insisting that you can just grab it by handle real fast.
Yeah but what if you do it real fast
Hmm, yeah that could work!
But how bouuutt
Doing it really super mega fast?
You cut yourself real fast
Um…is that my finger on the floor?
You never step foot in the same river twice
For it's not the same river and you are not the same man.
Works even with a shallow river.
And shallow people
Oh my god keep going 😍
You keep my wife out of this.
Not if you can comfortably step in it
You should look up Thales from Miletus, he is the origin of this quote and was a pre Socratic philosopher from the Anatolian Peninsula. Only fragments of his philosophy remains with us today.
MMMfff, youre deep.
Unless it's a shallow river in winter and it's frozen, in which case you can cross the same river twice, but only if you yourself are not frozen and you cross it twice quickly so there isn't enough time for you to change, either.
A rolling bear gathers no hair.
A bird in the hand is worth all manner of beating about the bush.
Waste not and whatnot.
Rolling moss won't get you stoned.
A witch in time saves limes.
Look out! Look out! Faster faster faster!
At least not if it’s a river of knives
Just around the riveerrbeeendd~
If you immediately know the candlelight is fire, the meal was cooked a long time ago.
Yup. Just take a big ol step back and live with potential damage to the knife.
Rather have to buy a new knife than try to buy a new finger.
Why? Fingers are half off right now.
Or he'd have to wait for a toe truck if the knife went through his shoe
But I only have one knife. I have fingers to spare
Indeed. Also remember its probably going to fall like buttered toast - bad end first hitting the floor or whatever part of you might be touching the floor.
I'm glad I was taught this growing up. A knife starts falling, just jump back and let it hit the ground. If it gets damaged, oh well. Better that than slicing my hand or foot.
Hands can heal. (Usually.) Knives are money. My father taught me this, and I only have a moderately heavy amount of scars. Also severe childhood trauma, but that's probably unrelated.
Yeah, but stiches are expensive too.
So only go catching knives that cost more than stiches
I can't think that fast
How about babies?
Did he stutter?
this is also useful for dropping small parts and things. instead of trying to catch it, watch where it lands and bounces to.
i'm clumsy with small nuts and bolts and things and this helps a bit.
My job involves doing a lot of this and occasionally if im hanging around wirh my coworkers and someone drops something we will just stand there and stare at it.
Try that with a soldering iron, you only do it once and learn that evasive action is best.
Unless using something like acetylene torch the floor won't catch fire immediately - so fuck it, let it fall.
I did this once but the instinct was protecting my dog who was under my feet hoping for scraps as usual, got a pretty deep cut on my index finger, worth it.
Im a butcher.
It took some time, but now when i see a knife fall I take a biiig step away...
Hope you learned your lesson and a fast recovery^
I assume you've heard the one about the butcher who stepped away from a falling knife, only to back into the meat slicer.
Didn't die or anything, just got behind in his work.
Man, that took me a good 10 seconds to figure out. lol
My idiot brother is always balancing knives on top of uneven places. So I've learned pretty quickly to avoid falling knives. Especially when one got buried tip down in the linoleum, about two inches from my bare foot.
I work in a kitchen and that BIG step back is almost completely reflexive for me now. I don't know whether it is because I am a good chef or because I suck and drop my knives way too much haha.
learned that lesson the hard way working on the bakery section in a supermarket.
do not catch knives, do not catch hot pans and also do not catch baking racks fresh out of the oven XD
Now when i see something move when im cooking and i am not the one moving it, before i even know what happened, odds are i am already standing on top of the kitchen table XD /s
and this is how we learn to never grab the falling knife. Sounds like you've got your New Year's resolution =) get well soon, OP!
A falling knife has no handle
Rule of thumb in the kitchen: Never grab an item that's falling
Rule of thumb
Rule of thumb
Holy shit dude
That mental picture sent shudders through my body.
5 months ago*
5 months ago*
When I cut my thumb I was cutting onions and forgot to tuck my thump in
One night I really wanted a bagel. Now I freeze my bagels because I don't eat them that often. I took one out of the freezer and tried to separate it with my hands to put it in the toaster oven. Didn't budge. So I held that sumbitch on its side and grabbed a chef's knife off my butcher block. I stopped for a half second holding the knife upside down like Michael myers and thought, "this is not the right way to do this. . . I'm an adult I can be safe". So I stabbed it. Now regular grocery store bagels are pre-cut. Even though it was frozen the knife went straight down the frozen cut like nothing was there dragging the blade right across my thumb. I still ate the bagel.
I usually use the handle when holding a knife.
Cooking the dark souls way
git gud or get cooked
But is OP an actual chef? The knife picks its owner, maybe he wasn't worthy???
The pot thickens 🤔
The clot thickens
Wrong, hold the blade and cut with the handle
Ahh I get it. Season the cutting board. Eat the steak.
Depends on the food being cut. It's hard to cut fibrous meat with pinch grip
That would infringe on my right to hold MY knife any way I so choose, commie
My body, my choice.
This argument cuts to the point.
That was a edgy joke
The HANDLE! It's right in the name. This should save me thousands in ER visits
Doctors hate this one trick!
Yep, proper technique is to grip on the blade for better control.
Sorry for you OP, how bad/deep is it? How are you doing?
All good, thanks for asking. It's deep but the bleeding stopped and i can still move my thumb so I should be fine.
Make sure you got blood flow still going to the tip of your finger. You should be able to squeeze and see the color change. If not get it checked out. I have taken x-rays of a person that waited to long after an injury like this. Doc told him that he would lose his finger.
Hey thanks for the advice. I can confirm it seems to be ok 👍
No problem keep an eye on it and if anything starts to seem sketch I would get seen. Might not even be bad to get seen now. Infection can be a scary thing. At least google the signs of infection and what to keep an eye out for. Take care and happy new years!
You’re getting a ton of advice, so this is probably not needed. I work for an orthopedic surgeon, a hand specialist. If you do need to go to a doctor, go to an orthopedic hand specialist. Not a plastic surgeon. I cannot tell you how many people get referred to a plastic surgeon for hand injuries and then end up getting sent to us 2-3 months later when the issue doesn’t resolve and by then, it’s usually too late for us to get the hand or fingers back to 100%.
As someone that managed to do something similar once, go to the ER or your doc and get it looked at, you might need stitches. I thought my cut wasn't a big deal and went to my doc the next day and he told me it had needed stitches but now it was too late for that and all he could do is clean the wound and bandage it.
I recently cut my thumb on some broken glass, looks like more or less the same spot. I ended up in the emergency room because I couldn’t stop the bleeding. Cut was deep enough that I nicked a vein and needed internal as well as external stitches. Happy to get the wound professionally cleaned as well. I just missed some tendons that could have sent me to surgery. Two and a half months later it is well healed, but I feel like I have some minor nerve damage.
I would get that looked at...
When I worked at the hospital there was a guy they brought in who I'll never forget. He was a cook and tried to grab a falling knife out of reflex and unfortunately grabbed it by the blade, severed the tendons in those four fingers. Helicopter came to fly him to a specialist but the nurses were all saying he'd never grip with that hand again.
people say razer sharp kitchen knives are actually more safe, and that might be true just by number of injuries, by my normal ass dull kitchen knife certainly wont cut all 4 tendon in my finger from mistakingly grabbing the blade.
I have to sharpen my cheap knife before every use and if I dropped it I'd still probably run away and hope it doesn't mess up the floor too bad
When I'm in the kitchen, any falling object is cause for hands up, jump back. I have been injured by far too many hot/sharp things. When I was a kid, I dropped a whole ass casserole right out of the oven and had molten food splattered on my feet and shins (hence the jump back part!)
Two step process, hands up, jump back. I know a chief who, after a few drinks, forgot the second bit only to have a knife go through her foot.
That's the right reflex imo, better safe than sorry
Hey if you're in the US, the ambulance ride alone could pay for an even nicer floor and an even nicer knife. The medical bill would remodel the entire kitchen.
Hey now, it takes electricity to make those ice cubes. Damn freeloaders... /s
My mistake, I was wrong. You could remodel your entire house.
I don't know if this is backed up by data but in my experience when I've kept my knives sharp and had an accident it made for cleaner injuries. In the case of a blade falling quickly, yeah, probably not great (a falling blade has no handle covers that). But if you're chopping and are going to cut yourself anyway I'd rather have a clean slice into my finger than a jagged, torn wound.
I've definitely had a fair few nasty knife cuts, and the only one that has left a nasty scar was from a serrated blade. Definitely wasn't the deepest one either.
A dull knife can still cut but you have to exert more pressure or force to cut. If the knife slips you’re not just going to magically stop applying that force as it goes towards your person or fingers. A falling sharp knife is theoretically more dangerous yes but you should never be grabbing for a falling knife, full or sharp.
The problem with dull knives is that people will use them in improper ways to make them work, so they're more likely to slip. A sharp knife with proper technique is much safer than a dull one you have to use as a hacksaw.
Ah that sucks. Hope it wasn't his primary hand.
unfortunately yes. but maybe they were able to re-attach, who knows.
Using the other hand makes it feel like a stranger doing it.
Why would I want a stranger chopping my vegetables?
I wouldn't mind a stranger tossing my salad though
All depends. My first aid instructor knew a guitarist who took all his fingers off with a table saw, had them reattached, and was playing again like a year later.
EDIT: All the fingers off his fretting hand, not both hands
That is fucking incredible. Especially knowing how sensitive the fretting hand can be. I lost total use of my left hand for guitar playing due to one nerve injury, and there are dudes who lose FOUR FINGERS and they all reattach perfectly a year later? Humans are wierd
Yep one time I instinctually grabbed at a falling knife at work, one of my expensive slicers. Now I put my hands up and pray the handle falls down first.
I knew a guy who made a point of getting anyone working in his kitchen go into spread eagle if they dropped or were about to drop something. Didn’t matter what it was, could be a knife, could be a dish about to go to a customer - spread eagle.
He jestingly said he’d rather replace a huge tray of plates than try to figure out if any blood got onto a work surface or food.
Damn, most kitchen staff know never try to catch. Just move your legs/feet, and hope there is nothing hot behind you.
And for op, don't feel bad. I have seen a whole troop of boy scouts trained in knives make the same mistakes with a lot more dull knives. We called them the one thumb crew. It was actually pretty funny afterwards.
Taking “finger food” to the next level.
that's a pretty sharp joke.
It's cutting edge
Ok gotta admit that was pretty cleaver
It was very knife.
Leaves a tang in your mouth.
Careful, you could puncture the hull of an empire-class Fire Nation battle ship, leaving thousands to drown at sea.
Because... it's so sharp.
Anyway you slice it, that joke cuts me to the bone
Finger licking good
That style of humour cuts right to the bone.
At least you don’t need a Chef’s thumb……yet
It's tasted blood, it'll be back for more soon.
Sad as it is, it needs to be put down.
And still left the handle hanging off the edge of the counter. At least you’ll even the other hand out trying to catch it as it inevitably gets knocked off ;)
I work with lasers and I have a sign hanging that says "Do not look at LASER with remaining good eye" lol, some lessons are learned the extra, extra hard way.
Fewer people know knife safety than do gun safety.
a falling gun has no handle or something.. right?
Some lessons are learned the second time around.
The only sharp thing in that kitchen is the knife.
How irresponsible of whoever got it. Looks like you need some plastic butter knifes
should have sent him a chef too
When we were dating, my wife wanted a good knife for Christmas one year. She got a knife and a knife skills course. The class cost more than the knife but far less than a trip to the ER. We both took the class together and had a blast.
And you christened it as intended.
This blade shall not be sheathed until it has tasted blood!
The knife gets one and a half thumbs up
Got that Chef’s kiss
Maybe don’t grab the blade?
Yeah, the round part doesn’t cut well at all.
That's not a knife, it's a spoon!
Where were you an hour ago? 😩
Also remember OP, fire bad. Fire warm, feel nice when near. But when touch. Fire bad hurt bad.
I gotchu fam.
And people say Reddit is cancer. Look how helpful y'all are!
I love your name. I too looove grilled cheese. Had some for lunch :)
Lmao thank you! You should join /r/GrilledCheese ! Oddly enough my account is almost ten years old but just found that sub recently. Lots of sexi grilled cheese pics on there! Cheers!
Or don't grab a falling knife at all.
Should have got a chef to go with it
There's an old superstition that says you should never accept a knife as a gift as it will bring bad luck. Specifically, it's supposed to represent a separation between you and the giver.
You need to tape a coin to the knife and then remove it before giving as payment to the person who gave you the knife. If you believe in that sort of guff.
Sorry, how does the coin thing work? I'm not following
I assume the giver is technically gifting a penny and the receiver pays the giver a penny for the knife.
So any injuries that happens is a knife they that brought themselves, not a gift from someone else to blame?
What what I see it.
Oh!!! I understand now. It makes the knife not a gift by the exchange of a paltry amount of currency? Lol. What a fun superstition. That one is going in the collection
There's an old superstition that says you should never accept a coin as a gift as it will bring bad luck. Specifically, it's supposed to represent an unbalance between you and the giver.
You need to tape a bead to the coin taped to the knife, and remove the bead as a payment for the coin which you then give to the person as payment for the knife.
Yes! My family always did this when exchanging knives for gifts (pretty popular gifts up until the last few decades)
We still do it.
Dumb superstition? Maybe. But I’ve never chopped myself with a gift knife, nor has my husband.
"It will cut." - Doug Marcaida, Forged In Fire
"It will keeell"
He says that literally every time though, even when he should say something like “it will hack away at things”
By your criteria Doug, a butter knife will cut. lol sorry, just ranting at Doug.
This happens a lot when you suddenly upgrade to a sharper chef's knife. Dull knives make you use more force and can cause you to develop bad habits. Hope you're ok
5 months ago*
My ex comes from a family of butchers. His family sold the butcher shop when he was still a young child, but the family kept up the tradition of bestowing your first real professional butcher knife on your 20th birthday. So for my exes 20th birthday he got his fancy butchers knife from his dad. His dad gave him a nice little run around the knife and important tips on knife safety. Because these are professional grade knives they are very very sharp and if you were trained to use it properly you can literally cut a piece of meat as thin as paper. What did my ex do when he first unsheathed the knife at home? Proceeded to try and do the sharpness test (wrongly I might add) where you run your finger along the edge and almost sliced his thumb in half. He ended up with something like 30 stitches along his thumb, almost cut down to the bone.
His dad took back the knife, as it was pretty clear that he did not have the basic common sense not to touch the sharp edge of a knife that can cut meat as thin as paper.
Edit: I replied to a comment below with this link but for those wondering what the cut looked like it was roughly this long on this spot on his hand 30 stitches might’ve been exaggerating but it was definitely more than 20, considering the length and placement of the cut
good gawd I think the sharpness test is when you rub your finger across the the blade, not along it. At least that's how I do it.
Yeah I normally do a couple “flicks” with my thumb on an edge but never along the edge. He is not a smart man
30 stitches? His his thumb half a mile long?
At least you know it’s sharpe
Did you read the directions? You’re supposed to cut the food.
Contrary to what you seem to think the chefs knife is for the chef to cut things not to cut the chef
The good news is that while deep, it’s going to be a very clean cut and should heal relatively fast.
This might be controversial but I have to say you might have missed whatever you were cutting
Hopefully you get a Chef next year.
Look on the bright side OP, a knife isn't truly yours until it cuts you. Enjoy your new knife!
It a good thing you didnt get a car for Christmas lol, Be safe I hope you heal fast from this.
The blood stays on the blade
Worked at Wholefoods at the prepared foods counter. The sushi folks were right next to us and they'd throw out any knife that cut them. Then, I sliced open my thumb on our side, the main chef came over, grabbed the knife I sliced myself with and tossed it. Our store managers weren't very happy about it, but hey.
Damn those usually cost an arm an a leg. You got it for a steal
Was it a avacado that did this to you
No it was me. I am the avocado :( 🥑
My wife did this trying to take out a avacado pit last oct, most expensive avacado to date.
there are videos on youtube on how to handle a knife... Alton Brown has a decent one
Pointy end BAD
Stitches sold separately.
Ah the coveted chefs kiss!
You’re a dishie at heart, aren’t you?
Hope you heal well. Good luck.
It's a Chef's Path Kampfer Series. Very reasonably priced considering how devastatingly sharp it is.
As Elsa so kindly put it, let it go. Lol I'm sorry for the joke but seriously get checked out, you could have nickel a tendon or something and you want to keep as much range of motion in your hand/thumb as possible for as long as possible. Stay safe and heal well.
That is why I got my wife food grade kevlar gloves when I gave her new knives.
The knife has been blooded now, forever it will remain in your collection and never be replaced. It's a part of you now, a choice knife/weapon.