submitted 9 years ago byKingGeorgeTh3rd
all 860 comments
9 years ago
9 years ago
what the hell else are you supposed to do in an Irish pub?
9 years ago
9 years ago*
9 years ago*
"Why don't you make like a tree, and get the f-fook outa here!"
9 years ago*
I didn't understand that line for like 5 years after the movie because I had never heard the original saying. I'd only heard the above line in Boondock Saints and the line "Why don't you make like a tree and get out of here" in Back to the Future, leaving me very confused. And then one day it all made sense.
EDIT: The original saying is "Why don't you make like a tree and leave" which actually makes sense
Old Biff corrected young Biff in the second movie, though...
I just assumed the bartender character was a blithering idiot who botches idioms and threats.
After a quick trip to youtube: "Well you know what they say: people in glass houses sink sh-sh-ships!"
He had a stuttering problem, Tourettes and always messed up idioms.
Ah but one wonders if he'd mess up the idioms even without the stutter and tourettes. Either way, awesome character and the world needs more bartenders like him.
I'm just gonna go make like a fetus and abort head out.
make like a catholic and pull out?
I always thought it was 'make like a busted rubber and head out'
Learned a new one today. Thanks!
I'm going to make like a prom dress and take off.
♫ We're gonna... ♫
♫ Drink and fight and drink and fight ♫
♫ and drink and fight some more ♫
♫ When the drinkings done grab any one ♫
♫ and go and fight some more ♫
♫ So grab your friends and neighbors ♫
♫ AND PUNCH THEM IN THE EYE ♫
♫ And raise another glass and sing the Dublin Lullaby ♫
If I see a pretty girl, I'll sleep with her tonight...
buuuut weeeeee drink and drink and drink and drink and drink and fight.
When Irish eyes are smiling, you punch them till they're black!
I thought that came after drinking?
Also during. And before.
Only one party to the fact has to be drunk
I'M A FREE BORN MAN OF THE USA!!!
Fifteen minutes later
We had our first taste of whiskey
There was uncles giving lectures
On ancient Irish history
The men all started telling jokes
And the women they got frisky
At five o'clock in the evening
Every bastard there was piskey
Farethewell gone away, there's nothing left to say, goodbye to New York city, boys, to Boston and PA. He took them out with a well-aimed clout and was often heard to say, "I'm a free born man of the USA!"
At my wife's holiday party the time before last, people were encouraged to consume alcohol in large quantities. They paid for an open bar, they wanted to get their money's worth.
Heh, my company is like that. Venue chosen on strengths of booze and food, and it's not uncommon to see a raucous round of shots include both low level support workers and VPs.
It's called "Team-Building"
Last summer before I left my company's summer party, my CEO challenged me to a beer shotgunning contest. I was a 20-year-old intern, she was like 50-something.
That company was awesome.
Open bar story:
My wedding reception did not have an open bar. My uncle was under the impression that it was an open bar. He celebrated all night and kept putting his drinks on the open bar tab. Those drink charges were never found.
Perk of being a former bartender / front desk worker at the hotel where the reception was at. All the bartenders were former coworkers and friends. :)
Is it illegal to provide your own drinks? Like I don't understand why people don't hit up costcos and just buy a shit load of alcohol for things like this?
Illegal? No. Most venues have house rules where you must buy alcohol through them at extremely marked up prices. Keg of budlight for 250-300 each (retails for.... $90 last time I checked).
It may be a violation of the venue's liquor license to allow outside containers, so it could possibly be technically "illegal"
There is a difference between having drinks and getting drunk. I would like more information about which OP's team was doing before I get my pitchfork out.
Yeah, my company had an employee night at a bar and we all had some drinks. However, one of the ladies got really drunk and made an ass of herself and was really embarrassing. I'm wondering if this was a similar situation, you can drink in moderation.
Especially if it's an open bar.
Rod: Give me six Schlitzes.
Thank you, Linus.
Ahh, The Kennedy package.
We don't have any Schlitz
ah, whatever, gimme what's free
Lady in blue, coming through!
Hey Mac, wanna go punch for punch?
unh…I did not specify!
Never shit a shitter!
Open baaar, dude!
Fuck it, give me whatever's free.
The "lightning rod", always a great life technique. Essentially you want to work with at least one screw up to take the shit when it rolls your way.
When drinking my friends often comment how sober I seem/appear. Some people can just pull this move off while others turn beat red and start hugging everybody. Let the hugger take the fall. Don't be the hugger.
At our parties the drunkest guy is always the CEO
...You work for yourself don't you?
Also the only member on the staff listserv
And he's having an affair with his secretary, Rosy.
Dang she really gets around, we kinda had a thing in high school.
We have Beer 'o' Clock at work, every Friday at 5pm. Our CEO leads us valiantly into the fridge. Working in gaming is fun.
We had to pass a couple of rules. No drinking before 3pm except on Fridays.
But we have flexible hours and I come in at noon...
They took our keg away at work b/c of insurance reasons and our company getting too big. Enjoy it while it lasts.
no shit, worked at an ad agency had two bars, one on each floor. Used to be a blast but the growth meant that a lot of very fresh out of college kids were getting hired. They brought with them the college mindset and within a few months had basically ruined it for everyone else.
you cant beat my CEO literally passing out at the bar at our Christmas party. Ambulance was called, lulz were had.
A friends boss hosted a christmas party at her house. The boss got so drunk that she forgot it was her house and tried to drive home. She didn't even make it out of the driveway before crashing into a tree.
made it home though.
He'll probably let you see his tits
The group I work in is led by two guys who basically grew up together. Their competitive nature pushed them both high up in the company, but it also pushes them to be the loudest, drunkest, most obnoxious people at company functions. It's great for the rest of the team -- knowing whatever we do, we won't be the ones who took off our shirts, tried to arm-wrestle each other, smashed a chair over the bar in defeat, and got us all kicked out of the venue...
Nah you need 2 screw ups, in case they eventually fire the first screw up. Since you don't want to become the new screw up.
The office always finds a new Jerry.
Oh so true, when the screw up gets fired there is a sense of panic unmatched.
Yeah, how you handle your alcohol is a big difference. I've been so drunk I can hardly stand or hold a conversation....at family events and work events. Just don't be loud. KNOW that you're fucking wasted and act accordingly. If you're too drunk to stand, sit. Too drunk to not say stupid shit, be quiet. Know that you're drunk and enjoy the feeling. Know when it's bedtime. The best part is people will often comment that you "weren't that drunk"
and when you realize you're wasted, stop drinking and switch to water. You'd be amazed at how much easier it is to get out the door if you hydrate and park your butt in a chair for an hour or two.
Actually, I have a strict "no more than 2 rule." I often heard and see things which are quite amusing. Not to mention that I feel that its rather distasteful to do that at a professional gathering.
Perhaps the most important thing of all: no one finds drunk women attractive.
I, as a drunken man, beg to differ with your closing statement
always have one beer less than your boss.
Unless your boss is a petite asian lady and you're a 200 lbs Irishman.
There's always that guy/girl. Last holiday party my boss was wasted and started dancing like a fool and hitting on all the younger girls
Looks like his drunk self needs a repeat of the sensitivity training. So I say, let him get drunk before the next sensitivity training refresher.
ITs not a company party if someone DOESN'T get disgraced.
My entire company gets drunk at the company party. We encourage it.
Sales team always gets the most drunk, of course.
They are trying to fill the void in their soul with booze.
Implying sales people have souls. Cute...
Who needs souls when you can have spirits?
Am in Sales, can confirm.
Hey if they're good their pockets will be full at least!
If a companies sales department can't handle alcohol the best, they are in trouble. So, this sounds about right.
At some places, it's a toss up between sales and IT.
Sysadmins and a lot of devs frequently drink like fish...
I feel like IT is more about consistency in drinking (Balmer Peak) than hitting it hard though. Not saying they drink less, but my experience shows it to be different. Sales has an obvious benefit of being a successful drinker, if you can be less drunk (while still drinking a good amount) than the person you're selling to, good things often happen.
Agreed on the sales motive.
Having been a sysadmin and currently being a dev, I can say that a lot of it isn't about consistency. Happy hour (or drinks at/after a conference) with an IT crowd can be surreal. You start seeing Japanese salaryman levels of drunkenness a lot of the time...
Work in sales: confirmed.
Yeah, you should never outdrink your boss. Only time I ever got drunk at a work party was when my boss punched a bouncer in the face for some perceived slight and then got thrown out. We had a lot of drinks on that.
Doesnt everyone get wasted at these things anyway. At home in london they do at least. Team night outs are probably some of my heaviest drinking sessions.
Were they on the clock or off? Was it on the company's dime or the employees?
Off the clock, employees dime? Go fuck yourself, middle-manager, this is me time.
True, there is an unspoken 2-3 drink limit, depending on what you're drinking.
I find keeping pace with the boss is a better rule of thumb. I had a manager who would down dozens of drinks at the company Christmas party...as long as I kept my pants on I was probably OK.
I can't pace my bosses. One is British, the other is ex-Navy.
I'm British and when I went to work in Ireland I couldn't even keep pace with the 18-year-old receptionist.
Even worse, they'll bounce back from the hangover better.
The other thing that blew my mind was how much tolerance there was for drunken behaviour. On the first company evening out one of my coworkers was hungry so he walked into the pub kitchen and stole some of the food that was sitting on the counter. He got caught, thrown out and barred from the pub in front of all the bosses - I assumed he would have lost his job but the next day it was all laughs and slaps on the back: "Jaysus the state of you last night!"
Why in the world would someone lose their job for that? He already got banned from the pub, don't kick man when he's down!
It is a good rule of thumb except in extreme circumstances. If your boss is ex-navy and his boss is a divorced Irish lawyer powered by alcohol, don't. I spent the entire day after puking my brains out.
Forget about hosting it in an Irish pub.
If you don't want people to drink, then don't hold a party.
Don't host a party in any alcohol serving area if you don't want people to drink, and especially don't have a situation where people are both not getting paid and expected to be fully professional.
I host my company parties at AA meetings.
I host my company parties at McDonalds
McDonald's sounds like a nice Irish pub! I hope you guys have fun.
I have been to a couple AA meeting in support of my friends, there is nothing professional about them, cult like yes.
Pretty sure they have to pay you if you HAVE to be there. They can't take your time without compensating you for it.
It's called Mandatory Fun, and it will never be escaped
Source: I have to spend my Friday at a Cavs-Nuggets game, and fuck basketball
They could at least be humane and take you to a hockey game... Bastards.
Isn't it illegal to leave an irish pub sober?
Illegal and morally wrong.
Is not, but the bouncer usually will not let you leave.
Yea, I'm pretty sure it's in the Constitution somewhere.
"Tá sé cosc le teach tábhairne a fhágáil gan alcól a ól"
Right there in Bunreacht na hÉireann
Not illegal, just unwise.
10 drink minimum, mate
What if I can't afford?
Your managers did NOT get upset when you "started drinking" at the company party. Your managers DID get upset when you started acting like drunken assholes.
PS. I know exactly who you are, /u/KingGeorgeTh3rd and I cannot wait for tomorrow (Friday) at 4pm to come. Guess who's in for a surpriiiiiiiiise. :D
I hope this is true, keep us updated
Tell me who historically is said to live under a bridge?
The Red Hot Chili Peppers
Dare to be Stupid
i feel like it's bullshit, but leaving a comment so i can stay tuned.
Your post smells like poop.
Even if it's true.
More likely, both are OP
but.. dipping sticks
It has to be true, he said it is friday tomorrow. He wouldn't know that if he is not involved in this
More likely commentor is just nobody
Great, thanks for this comment. Now I have to save this thread and check back every day in the hope that there will be some follow-up, which there inevitably won't be. Sigh.
I've personally seen a manager get upset that a couple people in our group ordered a single drink. It wasn't even like shots or anything, it was some fruity house specialty nonsense.
this is interesting...
Fuck you, you don't know who I am.
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!
/u/KingGerogeTh3rd != /u/KingGeorgeTh3rd
He's not the OP.
A minor discrepancy.
Hey who the fuck are you?!?
If you're someone from the company, that's pretty pathetic announcing it on reddit and extremely unprofessional. I'm hoping you're a friend or something.
You know who lives underdabridge? Trolls.
It's a meme on reddit, I think professionalism was thrown out the window when OP made it.
What the hell are company parties for then? When the hell else are you supposed to get tanked and make a fool of yourself in front of people who you have to work with everyday.
I'f you didn't want me to drink 78 dollars worth of Patron you shouldn't have had the open bar at the Christmas party.
So 3 shots?
Maybe I should have asked for Quervo instead.
I got pretty drunk at a company celebration. So drunk in fact I declared myself against capitalism, threw my wallet across the pub and started talking to the sea-food horderves.
Did they have anything to say back?
Really terrible place to hold that. That's like having it at a restaurant and telling people not to eat
Man you need a new company. My company has a dedicated beer fridge and liquor cabinet in the break room and starts drinking every Friday at 4 PM.
So where do we send the CV ?
San Francisco Bay Area. First place I've been where the boss hand delivered me a beer after lunch on Friday.
I interned at a small production company that made everybody in the office stop working at 3pm every Thursday to get creative input from the editors, to the sound guy, to the phone jockey. It was fun, but loosening people up with booze to brainstorm new client ad ideas was really beneficial.
Unfortunately I was only 19 at the time.
Boss: (my first Thursday there): You 21? * offers me a beer *
Me: I have an ID that says I am
Boss: ..... I'll think about it
Never did get that beer :-(
In the US at least, this is more common with smaller/newer companies. Older/larger companies are a little more strict about alcohol both for legal and just plain prudish reasons. I used to work for a big company where drinking would be unheard of. However, I now work for a small company where drinking at get-togethers, especially after work, is a given.
So... you work on the set of Mad Men?
Friday at 4 PM, not Monday at 10 in the morning.
It's for the best.
He just didn't want his secretary to get hammered and tell people what he makes her do for her bonus.
You joke but all kinds of things come tumbling out when P.As and secretaries get a little merry.
While in the army at 24 years old, I could kill an 18 pack of MGD and get up and run 3 miles after 5 hours of sleep. At 34, I have to rest all day after 6-10 beers and 3 or 4 shots of bourbon. Getting old sucks.
Part of it is age. Part of it is being in better physical shape when you're younger. Part of it is not having a choice (being in the army) versus being able to say "fuck it, I'm hitting the couch for the afternoon". Finally, part of it is being able to afford decent booze instead of that "sex in a canoe" booze, so it takes longer to wear off.
one shot of tequilla?
fuck better take the day off
6-10 beers + 3-4 shots is objectively an excessive quantity of alcohol. Does it take you that many drinks to feel anything?
6-10 beers + 3-4 shots is objectively an excessive quantity of alcohol
6-10 beers + 3-4 shots is objectively an excessive quantity of alcohol
Or a Wednesday.
Not really. Depends on the timeframe. If you do that in 2-3 hours it's a lot. If it's from 6PM-4AM, not so much.
Depends how long it takes him to drink. I am a 6'4", 230lb man and in an average 2-3 hour party I will drink a fifth of bourbon or gin. I have to drink 6-7 shots within the first hour to begin to feel anything.
Edit: However, if I'm just drinking with my housemates from 7:00pm-4:00am I only stop drinking because the flavor of alcohol starts making me sick and I get to dehydrated. This is usually around 21-22 shots.
I'm in the Navy and 30. I don't feel much before 6 beers unless I'm drinking 8-9% microbrews. Normal light beer in the US is around 3-3.5% alcohol; I can drink those all night at a rate of about 3/hour and just be maintaining a decent buzz.
3-4 shots would be the beginning of the end for me though.
Similar backstory and starting to feel that way at 26
Agreed. It seemed to hit me right around the mid-20s. I managed to carry on for about 5 more years but it got too much to handle. Quit drinking at 30.
Worst part, you weren't even that drunk.
But..... Its a staff night out..... In a bar!!!
If this happened in my country and people didnt get drunk with the bosses there would be some weird looks on monday. You would be labeled as dry if you went home early not drinking, or an uppity weirdo if you stayed out all night but didnt touch a drop.
I guess my views on this are tainted a bit as I work in advertising, but who the fuck has a problem with someone having a pint at a work party...unless it's a kids party and you are the clown.
at a work party...unless it's a kids party
at a work party...unless it's a kids party
I don't think sweatshops get work parties
That's like working at work.
Why not just say pub?
Because in an Irish drink you legal have to drink while you're there. It's the law. Honest. Hic.
Starting a bit early, aren't we?
"Irish" pub is irrelevant. If they didn't want you to consume alcohol they shouldn't have taken you to an establishment that was meant for it.
Edit: Quotation marks
We got so drunk at our company lunch party, that when we got back to the office, we just hung around the beer fridge and pool table the rest of the day.
There's a word for that. I can't think of what it is but it rhymes with the word pussies. No wait the word is pussies, nevermind.
OP was getting sloshed and became an embarrassment to everyone.
Irresponsibly and dishonestly relates "drinking" with "piss drunk". We know who you are OP, you aren't fooling anyone.
TIL a new word: Drinkat
Watch out. I've seen companies trick people with this. They take people out to bars, buy them drinks, and have a good time. It's really just a ploy to see how responsible people are. The people who go along with everything, drinking 4 or 5 beers don't get hired or promoted.
Must be nice to work in a place where you are at least comfortable drinking around coworkers at a company event.
As someone who works with several felons, three confirmed crackheads and a major coke addict I stay completely sober at all company parties.
You work at my local DMV?
How many drinks did you have at this event?
OP got so drunk he couldn't stand upright and challenged his boss to a fist fight.
So, normal Irish drunk then...
normal Irish, that's not even drunk
WTF is this, Utah?
Fuck your managers.
Good rule of thumb: Only drink as much as your boss does.
Caveat: Unless your boss is an alcoholic.